


Multiple Choice

by Ma_Kir



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Joker (2019)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Crack, Crossover, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Innuendo, Insanity, Jokes, Rescue, The Joker is Dead Long Live the Joker, Whipped Cream Pie, the beginning of a beautiful relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:21:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27574409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ma_Kir/pseuds/Ma_Kir
Summary: Harley Quinn gets another reminder that Love isn't blind.It's crazy.
Relationships: Arthur Fleck/Harleen Quinzel, Joker (DCU)/Harleen Quinzel
Kudos: 13





	Multiple Choice

Her Puddin's angry.   
  
Harley feels it coming. He's about to hit her again. She's on the floor, and he stands above her. It's ok. She can take it. It's the Mallet in his hands. Hers. He's coming towards her, his giant smile a frown when ...  
  
 _ **Bam.**_  
  
Mr. J's gun. The red flag, with the aforementioned "Bam!" is sticking out of it, smoking. And Mr. J's head's blown up better than a piñata beaten into cotton candy confetti by small children looking for sugar candy on the Day of the Dead. How sweet ... 

Harley's eyes are wide. She looks up, at the shooter, to see ...  
  
Mr. J?  
  
He's ... different. This Mr. J. That's the only word that comes into her shocked mind. This Mr. J's thinner. More ... threadbare. His hair's more dyed than pure green. Blue triangles trail down his eyes, and brown eyebrows rise above them incredulously. There is a sadder, almost beatific look in the way the light reflects off his sweaty face, and a sensual mouth painted with a dried red.   
  
Harley turns to the body on the floor with its garish purple coat, its trick flower, its striped pants, and back to the raggedy figure looming over her.   
  
He, Mr ... J. He slowly, tentatively lowers himself to the ground, his hands on his knees, looking at Mr. J ... the other Mr. J. Her ... Mr. J?  
  
"Hee." His laugh starts small. Almost plaintive. "Hehehe ... Hah. Hah." He wipes at his eyes, smudging them further. Then, he shakes his head, and looks directly at Harley.   
  
Harley flinches. She can't help it. He killed Mr. J. But there's something in that gaze, something she's never seen in Mr. J ... in the dead Mr. J. 

He leans forward. Harley doesn't think about scrambling up. Or getting her Mallet back. Or sicking the hyenas on him. Or just running away. He leans forward, and she ... leans towards him. When he kisses her, he tastes like blood and cigarettes, not sardines, like her Puddin. Something jolts inside her, and she feels her face running away with her. She's afraid. She knows what happens when she lets that frown turn right side up ...

He looks away. He's stroking her hair. Her tassels ... does she still wear that old thing anymore, aren't there. Then, he does something she doesn't expect. He takes her. He takes her and holds her. Hard. Whatever he saw, something melts inside of her. He embraces her more firmly, more warmly than Mr. J? Her Mr. J? Than any Mr. J ever held her.

"I'm sorry, Darling." He says, his voice so like his, but a different cadence, a different tone, a joke told in a way she hasn't quite heard before. "I would've killed to have a girl like you."

Harley blinks. Then she blinks again. "You ..." She's shaking and she realizes, after a while what it is, what it's going to be. "... well." She looks over at the other Mr. J. "I guess you just did."

Then regard each other. And then, they begin to laugh. Mr. J,'s laugh is loud, it is in him. It is him. He can't help it. Somehow, she knows, deep down, in the churning part of her core in her loins that he's still growing into it. And it's glorious. 

"Well." He says, tears of laughter streaming down his face making him years younger, angelic, beautiful, fallen, glorious in an understated way that no melodramatic cackling can even begin to match. "I guess, sometimes I just kill myself."

And this time, it's Harley that reaches forward and kisses him. Harder than anything else in her laugh. Because, right now, she doesn't just want him to rev up his Harley. She wants this Mr. J., _her_ Puddin, to have her whipped cream pie in his face. 


End file.
